smile without shame

Lessons to Teach My Carefree Black Girl Before She Learns Shame

At some point in our childhoods we leave behind that impulse to be naked to the world. Maybe we leave it crumpled on the floor in the bathroom one night and forget to pick it back up. The self that emerges is tremulous against the cold stares of society. Is my skin too dark? Am I good enough? Can anybody love me as I am? When I look at the woman I am now and the little girl I carried for 10 months, I hope she never knows shame like I have.

Continue Reading
Atlanta skyline

Here Are All the Reasons I Should Leave Atlanta

I still can’t decide whether or not I should leave Atlanta. But if I do end up leaving the A, there are some very good reasons why Atlanta is not the right city for a girl like me. I remember the one time I was at the mall and didn’t realize that the heavily made-up chick with the bodyguards was a Real House-something. I asked a bystander and she looked at me like I wasn’t an ATLien. Awk-ward.

Continue Reading
what weight gain?

“My Butt Getting Big”: Weight Gain and Self-Esteem on Social Media

If you’ve lived enough years past high school, it’s likely happened to you. You pick up a recent photo of yourself and gasp, “Is that me? I look…[insert ugly/fat/skinny/huge/sick/tired/ other self-flagellating adjective]!” Ever since I had my daughter 2.5 years ago, my word is . Many use an offending photo as a catalyst to change their lifestyle; that was my […]

Continue Reading

Married Sex: What it IS and what it ISN’T

Today is my 5th wedding anniversary. Yaay! I figured today I might be grown enough to talk about sex. (Hi Mom!)  I wanted to share what my short time being married has taught me about sex after the ring slips on. I’ve been thinking about this post for a long time because most unmarried people have […]

Continue Reading